Just Move On

BUT HOW? 

This is a question I’ve been asking myself for almost a year.

As someone who has spent years surrounded by the healing arts I still had no idea how to actually do it. I’ve got the tarot readings, the energy healing, the sound therapy, the somatic therapy, the sage, the crystals, the books- ALL OF IT. 

But how the f*ck do I heal?!

Well, I at least knew I couldn’t heal in the environment that broke me. I had to get out. I saw an apartment with a river view and said I’m going to heal there.

What I did was cry a lot. 

Sleep a lot.

Contemplate the choices I made.

Wondered if I’d ever be happy again.

Tried to figure out if I actually ever was happy.

Stressed about what stories were being made about me.

I was too depressed to even pick up the habits of excessive drug or alcohol use, because I know the type of person I am and where that would lead me. I wanted to numb everything. 

To tell a story, without telling a story, takes a certain kind of nuance. This one involves betrayal of self, love and friendship. One day I will get on my Ressa Tessa shit and divulge. But today, it’s still too fragile. There is still too much unfolding.

If you’ve been dealing with the heaviness that comes with letting go of a life you not only dreamed for yourself, but also built into a reality, I understand. I understand the grief that comes with making choices that affect people you love. I understand that pieces of you still long for parts of the life you’re giving up. I understand that not knowing what’s next and going at it alone is scarier than anything M. Night Shyamalan could dream up.

So how do you move on? 

I still don’t have the answer. I do believe it starts by choosing yourself. Just a little. Day after day you get a little bit stronger, you feel a little less broken. You start to remember glimpses of who you truly are outside of any circumstance and that world isn’t actually over just because your spirit feels broken.

You take a shower and deep condition your hair. 

You drink some water.

You eat something fucking enjoyable.

You archive the pictures.

You take a walk.

You keep living. I guess at the end of the day that’s the answer. You just keep living. Even if you can’t be optimistic, even though the weight of it makes you move slower. You just keep breathing.

7 Things You Need To Know | Life in Your Early 20's

In a short time, I will be exiting this beautiful bracket of life. I thought to myself, (as I lay in bed after a night full of drinks with names that make no sense, guys that make even less sense and jamming out to an awesome band) I should really bestow this information on the world….or whoever cares.

So in my last week of being 23 here is what you need to know about the early 20′s!! According to yours truly.
(Common Sense Disclaimer: Of course everyone doesn’t follow the same path. This is simply my opinions based off of my own personal experience. So its ok if you don’t agree!)

•You will most certainly meet a lot of ass holes.
Oh gosh, I mean its inevitable so I’m just warning you! Women mature faster, that’s science I think…ha! So guys in their early 20′s are in reality 15 years old.
I would say although I’ve had some very young bridal clients, the consensus I’ve gotten from older couples who have lived happy lives together, encourage having fun at this age and not putting so much stress on finding the one. This is the time you should be finding yourself.

•You will loose friends.
More bad news…ugh I know! But in retrospect some of the friends I lost did me a world of good. It’s a natural growing pain. I now have attracted people that fit the lifestyle I’ve grown to love. That lifestyle being Drama Free!

Self Discovery

Family

Here's to new beautiul friendships

Here's to new beautiful friendships

•You will be broke at times.
Whether you’re in college or just breaking out into the adult work field, for me this was the transition period. Going from having tons of help financially to doing it on your own, can be scary. There will be days Ramen noodles are your only option. My advice is tough it out. It builds character. Plus there is prosperity and abundance waiting for you. You will appreciate your things after you worked so damn hard for them!

•You will step onto a real path of discovery.
I have never loved myself more than I do right now. I feel like the past 2 years for sure I have grown tremendously. I have found not only a career that I love, but I have found a little piece of sanity. I am way more confident in myself and I believe that came from being on this path of wanting to know who I truly am.

•You get to be completely ridiculous.
Irrational, spontaneous, indecisive ..etc. The older you get you really have to tone that down, as more and more responsibility comes your way. So use it all up now. You are 20 something it’s soo okay ..and actually insanely fun to say “Oh well, I’m young” and people really do accept that as a legitimate excuse.

• You will like your parents a little more.
I hated my mom when I was a teenager. I felt like she was ruining my life constantly. I never got to do anything in my mind. The complete list of cliche teenage gripes is what I thought I was living.
As I’ve gotten older my relationship with my mother has blossomed. Everything she has ever done has been for my best interest. She is an amazing woman.I still learn so much from her, now I’m actually smart enough to listen!

There is a million other things I could tell you, but most important is
 

•Do everything!
The early 20′s is a time to explore ..everything!! If I had a dime for every time I heard someone older “I wish I would have done that when I was younger ..” well then I could have avoided the being broke thing altogether.

The early 20′s are a crazy, beautiful, scary, fantastic times. See the world, work hard, dance your ass off, laugh until your tummy hurts, love like crazy! I am so thankful to be able to continue to live & learn.

What are some of your experiences you’ve been through in this stage of life to share with the youngins coming to this time in their life?

Comment below or tweet me your advice @according2kana
And a special shout out to all the 2013 graduates!!!